So it was my birthday couple months ago. Had a party. Got some gifts. My friend “Mandy” for me a “super cute bikini”. I liked it. Said thanks. She had ripped the tags off but whatever.
Anyway. Went to the community pool with my roommate. Wore bikini. Got in the water. Roommate immediately is like uhm girl.... I look and see that this bikini is now kinda see thru.
Haha good joke Mandy.
Anyway, Mandy invited me over to her place to hang out with her and her bf and a few others. Most leave and we’re still hanging out. I’m like hey, what if we get in your hot tub? I go change after them. And meet her bf in the hot tub she’s getting new drinks. I hop in. Immediately, he’s looking at my chest. I pretend I don’t notice and just make small talk. She comes out a few min after. And just looks in shock. Eventually gets in. “Uhh is that the one I bought?” Yeah I love it. I wear it everywhere. Make up some stuff about how I wore it to the beach, some party with lots of guys, etc. and she’s just like “oh”.
We’re in the tub for 20-30. Eventually get out and change. She approached me after and was like. “Uhm I’m sorry thought you’d notice. But it goes kinda see thru”. I’m like yeah I know why’d you buy me a ducking see thru bathing suit? “She’s like it’s a joke. Wait you knew? So you just spent last 30’ flashing my bf on purpose?” I reply I’m just wearing my birthday gift from her.
Anyway. Aita?
Dad here, old fart, loves his daughter to pieces but I’m struggling to see eye to eye with my teenager and wife on this one.
We’ve always been a meat eating family, we live in the rural Midwest and bacon for breakfast is pretty much a given. This year my 14 y/o daughter decided to go vegan, and I jumped onto her support team with enthusiasm. We learned how to substitute ingredients, cook new things, try new things, I adjusted our budget to include more expensive vegan substitutes for her, etc.
None of this has been a problem for me until recently. She saw me cook bacon in a pan, and then I rinsed it out to load in the dishwasher. She exploded in anger (teen years, I’m not too fussed about the anger explosion, I know she doesn’t mean it) and said that that was HER pan for vegan food. I was completely floored and said, kiddo this here is a family pan, older than you, it’s not YOUR pan.
She asked me to purchase her a pan that she can solely use for vegan food. I didn’t want her to feel weird about food, so I said sure, and ordered her a few colored ones that are only for her. The reason they’re colored is so it helps me remember that I’m not to touch them unless I’m cooking vegan.
That wasn’t good enough. Now apparently the dishwasher is ‘contaminated’ with animal product, and the fridge has ‘bacon grease fingers’ on it (because I eat bacon and then touch the fridge) and she’s asked me and her mom to completely stop eating meat at home. I don’t mean I literally touch the fridge with greasy bacon hands, because I wash my hands, but it’s clearly enough that it upsets my daughter.
frankly I’m on team hell no, her mom is much more amenable and strongly wants me to consider taking our daughter up on the request. My wife’s reasoning is that both our parents live close so we can eat meat products there, and that she doesn’t want our daughter to feel uncomfortable in the kitchen. My daughter says she is fine with cheese and butter in the fridge, but it’s specifically meat products that make her feel sick. Now I’m sorry for her, but I feel like she just needs to adapt and live side by side, because I’m not going to stop eating bacon in my own house.
My aunt and uncle are paying for my cousins college.
My dad had a college fund for me, but he had stipulations like he wanted nothing below a B for grades and to pre approve any classes I take, weekly meetings to discuss grades and a bunch of other stuff. Which would be fine if you have a normal dad. Mine isn't.
My dad has a temper and I spent 6th-12th grade stressed out about grades and being screamed at or grounded over things that sometimes weren't even my fault like a teacher not updating online grading and an assignment being marked "missing" because of it. And getting my back pack and locker randomly searched by him for no reason besides "to make sure I'm not hiding anything ".
I decided to pay for school myself because of 1 not being stressed over getting screamed at 2 I didn't feel like constantly worrying that he'd disapprove of a class or a grade and decide not to pay. Which I could totally see him doing. I'd rather be in debt than controlled for 4 more years.
I just finished my first year.
Well my family got together on the 4th and... well sometimes they're nosey. They were talking about my cousins school and my uncle looked at my dad and said "well how much is - my name- school costing you?"
I said "what are you asking him for I'm the one paying for it?"
Later on my dad was pissed off and said that it was out of line to say that and I embarrassed him.
I didn't do it to embarrass him, I was just being honest. He doesn't even know how much tuition is so he was the wrong person to ask.
AITA
About a week ago, my (39F) family ordered Chinese food for delivery. When the delivery driver came to the door, my daughter (16F) was taking the cat upstairs to put in her room because he always tries to eat the food. My son (13M) loudly says, “Make sure the hide the cat from the Chinese guy!” as I am at the door getting the food from the Chinese delivery driver. He very obviously heard what my son said and was upset by it. I quickly apologized and took the food.
I told my son that racist jokes were completely unacceptable and very wrong and he refused to admit that he was in the wrong. So, later that night I forced my son to write a sincere apology to the delivery driver, (his name was on the receipt) as well as write a one page paper on Chinese culture and a one page paper on why racism is perpetuated by racist jokes and stereotypes. Then the next day I took him to the restaurant and had him read his apology aloud to the delivery driver as well as give him the papers he wrote. The driver was very appreciative of the apology and thanked me for making my son do it. He then told my son about multiple instances where he had faced racist comments and attacks from people while he was a delivery driver.
That night my husband (43M) and I got into an argument about me making our son do this. He told me that it was embarrassing for our son to have to do the apology and that the “punishment didn’t fit the crime”. I told him that it was much more embarrassing for the driver to have to face that kind of racism and racist stereotypes and that our son would get over the embarrassment. I do not condone any kind of hateful thinking in my house, and the fact that my son said that embarrassed me as well. My husband told me that it was “just a joke” and it wasn’t that big of a deal. I feel like I might have over reacted some but I think it’s important to help my son understand how what he said was wrong and hurtful.